Women's Voices From Around The World - Voice 6

I met my dear friend Courtney in 2017. I had been studying the Enneagram for a while and wanted to get my accreditation through the Narrative Enneagram, so I signed up for teacher and facilitator training. I met many wonderful people there who are a part of my soul family.

Courtney's warmth and sense of humor made me feel welcome. We dove into many deep discussions about our mutual type structure from the Enneagram point of view and acknowledged the ways we trap and sabotage ourselves. To meet another person who is the same type and subtype as me was like standing in front of a mirror, one that brought mixed feelings of shame (OMG- someone else can think like me!!), connection (someone else understands me!!) and acceptance of what is.

When we met again at Marion Gilbert's Somatic Enneagram training a few years later, it was an instant reconnection. I still remember this so clearly. We were both standing outside our rooms after a full day of class, and there was a light drizzle that neither of us seemed to notice. We were under a streetlamp, and I told her about my idea of teaching Family Constellations. At this point, it was just an idea rolling around in my head, and she said, "Please teach it, I am signing up!". I thought about it for a little more, and another friend, Jeannie from my Enneagram soul family, said: "Where do I send the check?".

I knew then that I had to do this. Courtney is also an incredible breathwork facilitator. I have had the privilege of attending her breathwork sessions, and I find her gentle and caring approach helps me to soften and open to the possibility of what my own breath offers me. Courtney and I still meet regularly and discuss the Enneagram and learn together. For me, the Enneagram is a rich system that keeps revealing deeper layers for me to explore and accept. In Family Constellations, we learn that love is an acceptance of what is, and it helps to have a safe harbor to witness us.

This Woman's Voice is Such a Beautiful Story of Finding Kindred Spirits Through the Enneagram, Breathwork, and Family Constellations - here is her story.

"I first met my dear friend Hemla at a Narrative Enneagram training. Right away, I was struck by her wisdom, warmth, and humor, and to my delight, we discovered we were the same Enneagram Type. Up until then, I hadn’t met many other Self-Preservation 4s in real life. I was thrilled!

Her perspective and inner experience resonated so deeply with me. The way she shared clarified my own understanding of my Type and reminded me just how important Subtypes are, the “secret sauce” of the Enneagram system. I knew I had found a kindred spirit.

At the time, I was moving from California to New York while she was still in California. Even so, I couldn’t shake the feeling that our paths would cross again and that we were meant to be in each other’s lives and maybe even work together one day.

A Fortunate Reunion

That reunion came a few years later at a week-long Somatic Enneagram training. What a surprise! After long days in the program, we often stood outside at night, talking endlessly.

One evening, I asked her if she had ever heard of “Family Constellations.”

Her face lit up: “I’m trained in Family Constellations! I’ve actually been thinking of offering this through a certification program. What do you think?”

I didn’t hesitate. “Not only do I think you should do it, but when you do, count me in!” Sure enough, in 2023, I joined the inaugural program, which was a transformative experience.

Today, my own work draws from the Enneagram and Breathwork, with a sprinkling of Family Constellations wisdom to support others’ growth. These modalities have profoundly shaped my personal journey, and it feels natural to share them with others.

The Enneagram: A Mirror and a Map

I first encountered the Enneagram in Beijing in 2004. English books were rare, and one day a friend returned from abroad with an Enneagram book. She said she “found herself in the pages” but wasn’t sure how she felt about it. Intrigued, our women’s group decided to read it together.

That book became our constant companion, and we talked about it for four years. The Enneagram landed like a sacred truth bomb: comforting, confronting, and utterly life changing.

For me, it is both mirror and map. It shows us where we’re stuck in patterns while also reflecting the beauty of who we are beneath ego. And it offers a clear, type-specific path for growth. For over 20 years, it has shaped my family, my relationships, and my life’s work.

Breathwork: Healing Through the Body

I’ve always known that our type isn’t just mental and emotional, it lives in the body too. That’s why Breathwork was such a revelation. My very first session released energy and emotions in ways I had never experienced.

Using a 3-part pranayama breath pattern, Breathwork involves 25 to 35 minutes of active breathing followed by a 10-minute rest. During the process, the body releases constriction, emotions move, and insights often emerge.

For me, it softened the grip of my Type.

I became certified in the David Elliott Breathwork Method so I could share this gift with others. Today, I use Breathwork to help free stuck energy, clear limiting beliefs, and create inner spaciousness. Paired with the Enneagram, it accelerates awareness and healing in profound ways.

Family Constellations: Remembering That All Belongs

While I don’t often constellate directly in sessions, Family Constellations deeply informs my work. It changes how I listen, not just to what’s spoken but to what’s left unsaid.

This practice reminds me that everything belongs. Nothing can be excluded without causing imbalance in the system. It teaches me to stay open, trust the field, and let truth reveal itself. The work becomes a reclamation: taking from our lineage what is good and beautiful, while leaving behind what doesn’t serve us.

Here is a link to Courtney's website to learn more: https://www.courtneyellerwilliams.com/

Coming Together: Breathing in Constellation

That long-ago feeling, that Hemla and I were meant to work together, is finally coming true. In April 2026, we are offering a weekend workshop called Breathing in Constellation, where we’ll combine Breathwork with Family Constellations.

It feels like the natural next step in our journey, two kindred spirits weaving together the threads of healing, awareness, and transformation.

✨ Closing Note: Whether through the Enneagram, Breathwork, or Family Constellations, these practices remind us of our wholeness and our connection to ourselves, to others, and to those who came before us. It is part of our voice."

This Woman's Voice is Such a Beautiful Story of Finding Kindred Spirits Through the Enneagram, Breathwork, and Family Constellations - here is her story.

Find out more about our "Breathing in Constellation" Retreat